Butterflies

December 17, 1982: I have the butterflies in my stomach feeling even when I just think about Padre Luis. What is it that draws me to him? What's the big attraction? He's almost my own age. Before I used to like men at least 10 years older than I am. But that can't be everything. He's tall, but not too tall. He's not fat and he's not thin, either. He's got fair skin, wavy brown hair and his eyes are between grey and blue. The thing I like best is his smile. It just wrinkles up his eyes and makes him look like a nice but mischievous little boy. No, he's definitely not boring. And I wouldn't call him a phony. Some people are. Never liked that at all. You can't trust phonies.
I'll keep on analyzing myself tomorrow. Now it's time to brace myself for the Matilde meeting.